And the strangest thing is not how many different feelings i have, but how fucking deep they are. Every single one. Deeper than anything i had felt for months. It feels like i had forgotten how to really feel.
I didnt even do anything special today, like anything. Just normal things, breath in breath out -kind of shit!! Well well. I slept for 14 hours. Woke up. Took a short shower. Ate. Ate again after an hour cuz i woke up so late. Sat around and talked with okaasan. Went out to buy the ticket from the nearest konbini. Walked around a bit. Came back, had a dinner. Talked talked talked. Watched the kouhaku (a music program they do on tv every new years eve that lasts for 5-6 hours). Came in my room and started writing this.
Hahaha writing that all down makes me feel as a sim XD
But everything i did had a spirit in it. I dunno, every little thing really felt something. I bought a nikuman in konbini and cant even explain the wonderfulness of its taste ;_; or how it fit in my hand perfectly..! Or how about the nostalgic feeling of walking into a used-record shop by our station! How you first have to tap the door before it slides open...!! Or how about the feeling you get to your legs when you walk on the yellow lines made for blind people! huhh.
I feel everything (...havent done drugs believe me).
How the people care for each other, how everyone is patient and tries to do their best for everybody, how the water taps in our house have to be pushed down, not pulled up, how it's cold all the time inside and how the weather is such a big deal in here.
How it smells in the air everywhere.
The smell brings the most memories of any senses, i've heard, and yes i do agree. The smell of the house brings me back to the time i sat upstairs in the third floor and did my kumons YFU expected us to do. Yesterday I smelled in the train air so many memories, today as i walked to the station I smelled the music i used to listen to back then, three years ago. I smelled the lyrics and aaaaa my brain just doesnt get all this i feel i feel -fuzz.
Even if i didnt actually do much, and even if the smallest things were the ones i felt the strongest, today happened many big things too.
Well, some of them were big and some enormous, some just small, but here we go:
1) I bought the ticket for the GazettE's 10.3. Makuharimesse live without any problems~
2) For the first time it really hit me how hard it even now is for japan to deal with the problems the tsunami caused. How much the people do suffer of it, psychically. The most of the Kouhaku was about it too, many artists gave their support to everybody... The pictures, the music was about it. They tried to give some hope for future and ppl are trying so hard here.
3) Okaasan suggested me to borrow otoosan's guitar for the three months i'll stay ;___;<3 i get to play during my lonely nights and have some own fun, and the gesture was so warm wwwww
4) I got a decision from one of the universities i applied in britain!!!!!!! dösjfdidofhdofhdcxm CANT BELIEVE I GOT ACCEPTED! To study drama and international relations in LONDON!! I wasnt excepting this o____o they require an interview andandand aa wuttttt!? Cant be an accident, right?? XD i had received two different mails about it! Now i just have to wait until i'll get the rest 4 decisions and then accept one of the offers...!! So the monologues i'll have to do from now on dont have to be perfect, i already got the place i desired the most ;__; guess i'll just do and send them in anyway, but no pressure about getting in anymore~! How crazy is that....!!!
Huuuuhhh. My day in a nutshell. In a big nutshell XD
Tomorrow we'll go to koenji with otoosan (dont remember translating this before, host dad), together by bike to see the shootengai there (i dont know the word in english but it's a kind of a long alley near the station with a lot of little shops there, we live in one too, but in koenji it's said to be really big) and the nekotalo i'll live from March on :333
I'm just sorry for the fact my iPhone doesnt work >____________________< thought i could be in touch with all through whatsapp and send free messages etc, use twitter.... D::: apparently there are no free Wi-Fi's nearby, and even while walking around some of the free ones asked for a code or sth, so sorry for those i promised to text as soon as i'd get here :///
Here still a couple of pics for ur entertainment~ it was cold outside (the wind is freezing!) so i wasnt out for too long.
so nostalgic XD no wonder i gained weight during my exchange year lolz
especially this one!!!!!!
Our street~
Oh i guess i'll have to change the timezone so that the posts will be in right time with me. have to do it someday, right now im just too lazy...
seeya again everyone ( * ,,・ 」・,,)~~ hope you'll have a good day all!
